Thursday, September 30, 2010

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Cocksuckers!


Dear SEGA,

If I fuckin' bleat
when I speak, it's because I
just got fuckin' fleeced!

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Monday, September 27, 2010

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Balls?


Dear SEGA,

Don't play it too safe.
Sometimes you should forget your
head and grab your balls.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

The Carlton

Dear SEGA,



Announce Shenmue 3,
and I'll do The Carlton Dance
till the sun don't shine.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Monday, September 20, 2010

You've Paid Your Dues


Dear SEGA,

Play it safe? Mistakes
are part of the dues one pays
for a full life, man.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Have Yu Suzuki On The Show


Dear Jimmy Fallon,

You fancy yourself
a gamer, right? How 'bout some
Shenmue on late night?

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Pain Is Temporary. Quitting Lasts Forever


Dear SEGA,

Hey, if you worried
about falling off the bike,
you'd never get on.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Friday, September 17, 2010

4 Shenmues Wouldn't Be A Crowd


Dear SEGA,

Three's company, right?
So get to making the third
Shenmue, already!

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Eyeballs


Dear SEGA,

Who needs visuals?
With what you've been making...we
don't need eyes to see.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Monday, September 13, 2010

Rikes!


Dear SEGA,

Rikes! Ruh roh, REGA!
Renrue randrich, ree hee hee!
Rooby rooby rooooooooooo!

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Never Trust The Artist. Trust The tale


Dear SEGA,

I like to write when
I feel spiteful. It is like
having a good sneeze.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Wild On! Guilin


Dear SEGA,

Hey, how about a
Wild On! that cave in Guilin?
GET WILD ON THAT SHIT.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

---> Insert Title Here <---


Dear SEGA,

You say you shouldn't
make new games like Shenmue 3,
I say you better.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

No More Garbage


Dear SEGA,

Put the service in
Service Games by not making
crap licensed titles.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Friday, September 3, 2010

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Master Of Adventure


Dear SEGA,

I write to escape;
to escape poverty and
life without Shenmue.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.