Monday, May 31, 2010

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Friday, May 28, 2010

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Shenmue 3 Time, Excellent!


Dear SEGA,

Shenmue 3, denied!
Hey, I know, I'll just play the
"Make Shenmue 3 Riff!"

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Monday, May 24, 2010

What Hath SEGA Wrought?


Dear SEGA,

What hath SEGA wrought?
Lots of great games, lots of bad.
No Shenmue 3, yet...

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Another Sonic Rant


Dear SEGA,

Sonic's problem is
that it's like being born rich
and getting poorer.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Thursday, May 20, 2010

The Dance Of Joy



Dear SEGA,

Hey, cousin Sega!
Make Shenmue 3 and we shall
do the dance of joy.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Fezzik, Listen. Do You Hear That?


Dear SEGA,

That is the sound of
ultimate suffering from
all the Shenmue fans.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Blerg


Dear SEGA,

They have Shenmue 3?
I want to go to there! Yup.
But you won't let me.

:(

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Monday, May 17, 2010

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Bond, Not Pond


Dear SEGA,

The name's Bond. James Bond.
A vodca martini please.
Shenmue threed, not stirred.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

At Least You'll Still Be Taking People's Quarters


Dear SEGA,

Keep making bullshit.
Pretty soon you'll be sleeping
in cardboard boxes.

Ten shit games later,
chapter eleven AHOY!
That's where you're headed.

So stop making crap
and start making games that rock,
like the good ol' days.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

A Shitty Limerick for Ye'


Dear SEGA,

You used to be called Service Games
And used to kick ass and take names
Then you merged with Sammy
And your games got shammy
Shortly after that you lost fames


Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Fuckinay Right


Dear SEGA,

I've been doing this
for a year now, and I'm good
for another ten!

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Monday, May 10, 2010

Get To Work


Dear SEGA,

Ya know, it's stasis
that kills you off in the end,
not your ambition.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Happy Mother's Day!


Dear SEGA,

This year, get her a
box of Shenmue 3, instead
of milk chocolate.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Keiji Inafune's Favorite SEGA Game?


Dear SEGA,

He liked MM3
the least, maybe he will like
Shenmue 3 the most.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Friday, May 7, 2010

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Shenmue 3 > Fable 3?


Dear SEGA,

At least you don't have
Peter Molyneux's penchant
for hyperbole.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Monday, May 3, 2010

Sunday, May 2, 2010

In Automotive Terms...


Dear SEGA,

...Your games may supply
the power, but you guys have
to do the steering.

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.

Saturday, May 1, 2010

In Hawaii, May Day is Lei Day


Dear SEGA,

It's May Day again.
Bring in the summer with a
brand new Shenmue game!

Sincerely Yours,
Shenmue Fan.